Audition Dates
Saturday - Feb 7th from 11AM - 3PM
Sunday - Feb 8th from 4PM - 7PM
Audition Locations
4030 Roland Ave, Baltimore, MD 21211
Story
THE STORY - Alice Sycamore has to introduce the family of her fiance, Tony Kirby, to her own family. The Kirbys are a wealthy, stuffy family of great importance, while the Sycamores are a collection of lunatics. When the two families come together, lifestyle and philosophy collide with uproarious laughter.
Production Timeline
Table Read: TBA
Rehearsals: TBA
Rehearsal off book date: TBA
Tech Rehearsals: TBA
Previews: TBA
Shows
Apr 24 - May 17, 2026 Fridays and Saturdays at 8:00 pm
Sundays at 2:00 pm
One Thursday evening performance at 8:00 pm on Apr 30, 2026
Character Breakdown
Martin (Grandpa) Vanderhof (the head of the family; father of Penny): the main role. Wise but understates his wisdom, mostly via wry asides; not a show-off. Unflappable with a huge store of common sense, mixed with the “demon of practical joking”: he contemplates Gay Wellington’s substantial rump as a darts target! Cynical but not bitter. You can’t always believe what he’s saying, but you would be a fool to try to call him out (as Mr. Henderson finds out). Age: about 75 years old.
Ed Carmichael (Paul and Penny’s son-in-law; married to Essie): matches Essie well; a nice young man but not terribly deep: plays xylophone very well [we will fake this!] and has a lot of small-motor-control hobbies, but doesn’t ask too many questions. Not ambitious; content to just live each day as it comes. Not bad looking but not good looking, either; very “normal.” Devoted to Essie. Age: early 30s.
Tony Kirby (Anthony Kirby, Jr.): a nice young man: handsome, never had to work a day in his life and maybe never will, and yet knows, inside, that this isn’t “right” and that he hasn’t really decided what he is good at, and this bothers him, a little. He could so easily just be a preppy college boy of the “Gentleman’s C” type, but he’s more than that. Tony has seen the world, but hasn’t really been changed by that experience. Underneath his privileged upbringing, he has remained in touch with an inborn common sense, so he has the ability to see people as they really are, and he generally appreciates and likes them. We can see what Alice sees in him! Age: about 24 years old.
Mr. Kirby (Anthony Kirby, Sr.) (Tony’s father) (Acts II and III): Stuffy, stolid, conventional, successful, powerful man-about-town; used to getting his way and is frank about it. Mr. Kirby was forced by his family to suppress any thoughts of creativity or personal fulfillment other than succeeding in leading the family business, and he does not realize how much this sacrifice has been gnawing at him over the past 25 years, how much of a toll it is taking on him now, and how little it might take to release his old inner creative self from captivity. Age: mid-50s.Mr. De Pinna: a real New York City type, he came to deliver the ice one day 8 years ago and never left. Brooklyn-born-and-bred with heavy Noo Yawk accent; devoted to his hobby/profession (the home manufacture of fireworks) which he engineers with wild enthusiasm. No hang-ups; takes everything in stride. Smokes a pipe and reads the Racing Reports, even while posing as a Roman-toga-wearing model for Penny. Bald, probably pot-bellied. Age: 50s.
Paul Sycamore (married to Penny; father of Essie and Alice): quiet and charming, he goes with the flow and doesn’t ask too many questions. Not ambitious; content to just live each day as it comes. Assists Mr. De Pinna as needed with the fireworks but defers to him on details (Paul defers most of the time). Not bad looking but not overly good looking, either; very “normal.” Devoted to Penny and both his daughters. Age: mid-50s.
Boris Kolenkhov (Essie’s ballet teacher): Russian emigré balletomane. Should be much larger than life: if possible, very hairy; booming voice; booming ideas; no filter. Totally extroverted emotionally, psychologically and physically (does a wrestling take-down of Mr. Kirby!). Boris does whatever he must to stay afloat in this harsh world. Fiercely anti-Communist; has heavy Russian accent and is proud of it. Still loyal to the old Romanov exiles now spread throughout New York! Probably about 40 years old but could be any age.
Donald: the boyfriend of Rheba — nattily dressed; able to work but doesn’t want to mess up being given “relief” (presumably via the Federal Emergency Relief Act, which peaked in 1935-1936). Nice-looking; not book-learned but highly intelligent. Accepts the necessary vicissitudes of life for a guy like him in the Depression era of the 1930s. Donald and Rheba are not married but are a solid and faithful couple. Age: 30s.
Penelope (Penny) Sycamore (daughter of Grandpa; mother of Essie and Alice): the main female part, appearing in every scene: unflappable; uninhibited; a bit ditzy; says exactly what’s in her mind without a care in the world (“You’d think with forty monks and one girl that something would happen”); not far below the surface, Penny has a deep and romantic heart. She is a devoted but unproduced playwright; she is a devoted but unfinished artist in the Toulouse Lautrec style. She is in her early 50s.
Essie Carmichael (older daughter of Penny and Paul): a nice young lady, but not a terribly deep thinker; an earnest dancer (a classical ballet wannabe), dances nonstop all through the show no matter what is going on! Thinks Ginger Rogers can’t dance a lick compared to Fred Astaire, and says so. She has a lot of will power that is not necessarily matched by talent. A limited cook, but she tries to make up with enthusiasm what she lacks in skill (1936 was before cookbooks were common). Pretty but not overly so. Devoted to Ed. Around 29 years old.
Alice Sycamore (younger daughter of Penny and Paul): young, fresh, enthusiastic, beautiful, smart and sees things very clearly (or thinks she does). A bit fluttery at times. Not worried about “falling for the boss’s son,” because she sees Tony’s basic worth, and appreciates his humor and his moral core. Alice sees the problems that a romance with the boss’s son MIGHT engender without being frightened by them. She does feel some inner doubts as to whether her family is really part of the real world, or not, but hasn’t shouldered any responsibility to change them, mostly because she does love them as they are (she’s just a bit embarrassed by them). Age: Early 20s.
Rheba: the cook, housekeeper and long-time “maid of all work” for the family: loyal and in many ways more “aware” than anyone except possibly Grandpa about what is going on with this slightly kookie bunch: she is "the servant who actually runs the show." Rheba is protective of her Donald. She understands, accepts and copes with all the various idiosyncrasies of the greater Vanderhof family. A good person! Age: 30s.
7 SUPPORTING ROLES, including but not limited to: Mr. Henderson (Act I only) (An agent of the IRS). Mid 50s; Hide-bound bureaucrat with no creativity or flexibility: a stock character: the no-sense-of-humor office guy. The kind who delivers eviction notices! [Same actor could play Mr. Kirby.]
The Grand Duchess Olga Katrina (“a cousin of the Czar”) (Act III only): She has seen a lot of sorrow and loss in her life, but has kept her spirits up throughout, and in some ways she is happier now that she is free of the strictures of the Czarist court, and in charge, for once, of her own destiny. She can be a very funny person (“Everyone wants to know about Rasputin … yes, my dear sir, it is true. AND HOW!”). She is in her late-40s-to-mid-50s, probably, and speaks with a Russian accent: this is 19 years after the Russian Revolution and Olga was at around 30 at the time… This is a major “cameo” role.
Mrs. [Miriam] Kirby (Act II only) (Tony’s mother): snooty; repressed; drenched in “noblesse oblige”; she is tied to superficial things and fashionable pursuits after a quarter-century of being a society wife, but has really gotten bored with it all, and she has started to chafe at the strictures of her gilded cage, which lowers her inhibitions somewhat. She should sound like she’s channeling Katharine Hepburn in The Philadelphia Story. In her mid-50s.
UNDERSTUDIES may be cast for the major parts.
